The Deipnosophist

Where the science of investing becomes an art of living

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Location: Summerlin, Nevada, United States

A private investor for 20+ years, I manage private portfolios and write about investing. You can read my market musings on three different sites: 1) The Deipnosophist, dedicated to teaching the market's processes and mechanics; 2) Investment Poetry, a subscription site dedicated to real time investment recommendations; and 3) Seeking Alpha, a combination of the other two sites with a mix of reprints from this site and all-original content. See you here, there, or the other site!

07 July 2006

Some humor for the weekend

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy . There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community.

If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy. If the Pope won, they would have to leave or convert. The Jewish people met and picked an aged, but wise, Rabbi Moshe to represent them in the debate.

However, as Rabbi Moshe spoke no Italian and the Pope spoke no Hebrew, they all agreed that it would be a "silent" debate. On the chosen day, the Pope and Rabbi Moshe sat opposite each other.
• The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Rabbi Moshe looked back and raised one finger.
• The Pope waved his finger around his head. Rabbi Moshe pointed to the ground where he sat.
The Pope then brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine.Rabbi Moshe pulled out an apple.

With that, the Pope stood up and declared that he was beaten; that Rabbi Moshe was too clever and that the Jews could stay in Italy.

Later, the Cardinals met with the Pope, asking what had happened. The Pope said,"First, I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there is still only one God common to both our beliefs.
Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He had me beaten at my every move and I could not continue."

Meanwhile, the Jewish community was gathered around Rabbi Moshe. "How did you win the debate?" they asked.

"I haven't a clue," said Rabbi Moshe. "First he said to me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger! Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews and I told him we're staying right here."

"And then what?" asked a woman.

"Who knows?" said Moshe, "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine.

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